Hey everyone ♥
So, I've not blogged about me for a while. So i thought I'd do that.
I've let it slip. I was in such a good place before D came back on to the scene, and since he has, my life's plummeted back down to rock bottom. Why do I do it to myself? Why do I let him make me feel like this? I can tell you now, it stops here. I broke down last night, I'm sick and tired of feeling like I'm not good enough for anyone, because he doesn't want me. It makes ME feel like I'm nothing. I'm not worth anything. That's wrong. He shouldn't make me feel that way. I was told last night, how I'm too good for him. How he doesn't deserve me. How he isn't worth it. And how it should be that he is not good enough for me, and he should feel that. I'm going to work on that. He's hurt me too much for anything to come of us. So why do i get upset? I think i feel like a fool to be honest. I took a leap and landed flat on my face in front of him, so if anything I just feel like an idiot!
On a brighter note, there's a new guy on the scene. Before i bet D, i met J. I gave up being with J, for D. Now he's back on the scene. He's actually coming over tonight, and for the first time in a long time, I'm nervous. Excited. I have butterflies in my stomach. It's... normal. Nice. I want that a lot more.
As you know, the April Challenge was posted Sunday. I started at 123.3 (Monday morn weigh-in) after major binging. I was sickened, and I actually said i wouldn't leave the house until i got to 119. AT LEAST. Well, i went out last night. I was at 122.6lbs at about 4pm. And although i felt a bit fat, i went for it. I woke up today and was excited to weight, since i lose a couple lbs when i go clubbing. 119lbs exactly. Really?! I dropped 4.3 lbs in the course of 24 hours? Epic win.
Not much else i can think to say. For now! So stay strong everyone, let's drop the lbs for this challenge!!
All my love,
El xox
Don't forget bloggers, the April Challenge is going on and you can still get involved. Check it out, and comment the stats on the blog post to enter! GOOD LUCK ♥
You're so beautiful, love your outfit in that pic! But zombies creep me the hell out lol.
ReplyDeleteYou're abso rite - if that's the way D's treating you, then there's nothing left for you there! Do what's good for YOU darling!
Good luck tonight with J! Stay skinny! <3
Is that you! You're so cute and pretty! Aww good job on the 4 lbs, you can do it :)
ReplyDeleteyws dont let d run ur life or make u think differenlty u deserve to b treated like a princess u got that
ReplyDeleteZombies are the best, and you look amazing and adorable!! I wish I was brave enough to show my legs, but they are just too awful. :( I would love to join the challenge but I won't be weighing myself again until Monday... Is that too late?
ReplyDelete* And by that I mean I currently have no idea what my weight is, lol. So it would HAVE to wait until Monday.
ReplyDeleteYou. Look. AWESOME! <3
ReplyDeleteYou're a sexy ass zombie!
ReplyDelete~MLM